Many good days later...

R. is doing so well in school right now...I am so proud of him and his teachers. It gives me hope for next year when he is in middle school (yes, middle school starts in 5th grade in Metro schools). He has his routine down, and is even doing more writing. He copies down his homework each night into his agenda, and is working so hard on his homework. I have my fingers crossed that the rest of this year will continue on this path.

Here is a quote I found online that I want to share:

"Autists are described by others - and by themselves - as aliens among humans. But there's an irony to this, for precisely the opposite is true. They are us, and to understand them is to begin to understand what it means to be human. Think of it: a disability is usually defined in terms of what is missing. But autism is as much about what is abundant as what is missing, an overexpression of the very traits that make our species unique. Other animals are social, but only humans are capable of abstract logic. The autistic outhuman the humans, and we can scarcely recognize the result." --Paul Collins

HE HAD A GOOD DAY!!!

I can't believe it...we're only 1 1/2 weeks into the school year, and today, R. had a good day! He did his morning routine, did his work, and earned his prize he was working for today. HOORAY! I can't tell you how much this means to me. Just yesterday, the resource teacher was coming up with yet a new plan because R. had taken something from a classmate and ripped it up. It escalated into R. running at his teacher, but Mr. W (his teacher) followed the BIP (Behavior Improvement Plan) exactly, and a crisis was averted. But, today he followed the rules, did his work and earned a prize.

BIG SIGH! I know that it is just one day, but sometimes one day is all you need to have hope for the next one.

Better days

So, finally, someone came up with a better solution. R's resource (newspeak for special ed) teacher now meets him at the school doors each day and takes him to his regular classroom. He is comfortable with her since he's known her for over a year, and there is no "going from me directly to New Teacher" anxiety with R. anymore. I wouldn't say he goes to her happily, but there is no fight like there was last week. Big sigh of relief.

More R-isms:

(Talking at the dinner table about him being hungry during the school day):

Me: So, why do you think you are hungrier this year at school?

R: I think it's because lunch is sharper than it was last year.

Me: Sharper? What do you mean?

R: You know how they say "eleven o'clock sharp?" Sharper!

Me: Oh, you mean it's earlier than last year!

R: Right!

The way his mind works....

First day of school

Conversation in the car on the way to first day of 4th grade:

Me: So, do we need to go over your rules while you are at school?

R: No, I hate school. Why do I have to go?

Me: Well, it is your job, just like my job is to go to work and make money to support our family. Everyone has to either go to work or go to school.

R: What about kittens? Do they have to go to school or go to work?

Me: Well, no.

R: Then, why can't I stay home like the kittens?

Sigh. He didn't want to walk up the stairs (stopped halfway on them and didn't want to budge), he didn't want to go in his classroom, he didn't want to sit in his seat. It took me about 15 minutes, but I finally got him in his seat. And, then I left. Bless his new teacher, and I hope that he has better luck than I did this AM. I haven't had a call from school yet, so--fingers crossed.

All I could think about as I left the school was: I am so envious of all you other parents of kids who are calmly or excitedly sitting in their chairs right now.

Read this article!

It's a good one.

Kids come back from their dad's in a week...am I ready yet? Mostly. I am going to try a new "chore chart" system this year (but I'm not going to call it that). I've decided to use a visual chart/schedule for R. posted on a bulletin board in his bedroom, so that he can see what he needs to accomplish everyday. It's a modified version of FlyLady (whose system I've started using over the summer--it's working for me so far!). We'll see how it goes.

Appointment with Dr. J. (psychologist) today, and we'll be meeting with R's new teacher next week. Fingers crossed that this year goes better than last!

My new favorite political joke

George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and Alberto Gonzales are all flying over New Orleans in a Blackhawk, surveying the progress that has been made in rebuilding the city and the levees. As they fly over the Ninth Ward, Cheney looks out the window, grins, and says, "You know, I could throw a thousand-dollar bill out the window right now and make one of those poor bastards very happy."

Bush says, "Well, I could throw ten hundred-dollar bills out the window right now and make TEN people very happy."

Not to be outdone, Gonzales chimes in, "Oh yeah? Well, I could throw a hundred $10 bills out the window and make a HUNDRED Americans very happy."

Hearing this, the copter pilot rolls his eyes and says, "Man, I could throw all three of you out the window and make 300 million Americans very happy."

Save the world...vote Democratic.

New Movie

Here's a review for a new movie called "Snow Cake" which stars Sigourney Weaver playing a women on the autism spectrum. Sounds like a good one. Also, you might want to check out
"Mozart and the Whale" if you want to see another movie with characters on the spectrum.

Recent R-isms

While riding on a big, swinging seahorse at the RenFest:

R: "My nuts have no gravity!"

In church yesterday:

Me: "Isn't that music pretty?"

R: "How can music be pretty? It has no image!"

In the car this weekend, talking about his stuffed animals:

R: "My stuffed animals hate me."

Me: "How do you know? Did they tell you?"

R: "No, they can't talk."

Me: "Well, then how can you tell they hate you?"

R: "Because of their ATTITUDES. And their MOTIONS. And their ACTIONS."

Post before the end of April

So, here we are and I'm back to my old ways (not posting for months at a time). Update: R. is doing very well in school...his new teacher is awesome! She has literally turned a horrible school year around for R., and for that, we are eternally grateful. R. loves his new psychologist (Dr. J.), and she seems to have had such a positive impact on him these past few months. He actually asked to call his dad a few times in the last few weeks (something he would never have done before), and he is now writing so much better (still a bit hard to decipher his handwriting, but he is getting faster and less frustrated with his writing). We had a funny conversation the other day:

R. wanted me to say "yes" to something he wanted to do.

Me: R., I'm still thinking about it.

R: Well, is it "yes" or "no?"

Me: I'm in the middle...I'm halfway to "yes."

R: Then, what will you do with the other half?

Literalism rears its funny head again. He turns 9 in one week....hard to believe! He's having his birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese...let's hope we all survive!

Another Brick in the Wall

I know I have a readership of about one now (Hi, Mom!), but if anyone reaches my blog due to the SSA issue (Standard School Attire), you can find more information at the MPASS website.

Happy V-Day!

Happy Valentine's Day to everyone! And since I am the mother of a teenager (and a trained sex education facilitator for my church), I want to let everyone know about Scarleteen, a great website that offers positive and thorough information about sexuality and related issues. If you have a few extra bucks, donate it to them...you'll be glad you did.

A fun quiz for the day

Don't know if this is exactly right, but it looks like I may have a 2nd career in TV or radio...

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The Midland   "You have a Midland accent" is just another way of saying "you don't have an accent." You probably are from the Midland (Pennsylvania, southern Ohio, southern Indiana, southern Illinois, and Missouri) but then for all we know you could be from Florida or Charleston or one of those big southern cities like Atlanta or Dallas. You have a good voice for TV and radio.
The South
The West
Philadelphia
The Inland North
The Northeast
Boston
North Central
What American accent do you have? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Sorry, I can't get the link to work right, so click here to take the test yourself.

Bless your heart, Miss Molly

Molly Ivins died yesterday...what an amazing woman. She will be missed.

R-ism: Umbrella language

Driving to school one day last week, R. is kicking an umbrella with his feet and it is making an annoying "whooshing" sound...

Me: R, please stop kicking the umbrella.
R: No, I like the sound.
Me (being playful): Are you speaking to the umbrella in its language?
R: Yes
Me: What is it telling you?
R: That it is an umbrella.

(Watch the "In My Language" video in the post below to get more context for this conversation)

New Autism links

• The Blame Game: Are School Problems the Kids' Fault? (from Wrightslaw, a great resource for parents looking for information on IEPs, state and federal laws, etc.)--a great article about school culture in terms of pinning almost 100% of children's educational problems on them and their parents, rather than looking at faulty teaching, faulty curriculum, etc.
  

• Article on new brain research regarding autism
  

• "In My Language Video"--a YouTube video made by a person living with autism to describe how she interacts with her world...make sure to watch it all the way through as the second half is her explanation of the first half. This is a facinating video!
  

New Year

An update on R.: he was suspended on his 2nd day back at school due to hitting his teacher. As I explained yet again to the principal how suspension to R. is like a reward (he gets to stay with mom! And doesn't have to go to school which he hates!), she basically admitted to me that the suspension was more about setting an example for the other kids than helping R. to deal with his problems. Anyway, I didn't fight it, so he was at work with me for one day, and he had in-school suspension for one day--both of which he enjoyed. I had him write an apology letter to his teacher, and had a long talk with her about some of the possible causes for the hitting incident. She was very gracious and she told me that she didn't want him suspended, but that it was the principal's decision. Whatever. At this point, I am just trying to keep R. off her radar screen and hope that we don't have any further incidents this year. When he got his most recent report card, he had brought all of his grades up (to A's and B's), so that was a definite plus. Also, after the suspension incident, I made an appointment to go see a new psychologist. We have seen Dr. J. 3 times now (once with just D. and me and twice with R. and me), and I think it is working for R. He really seems to like Dr. J., and looks forward to his visits with her. I hope she can give him some tools to deal with his aggressive and fearful feelings.

Sigh. Some good days, some not-so-good days. And so it goes...